Saturday, September 09, 2006

Slave Gardens

Remember when building a rock garden was an enjoyable pass time for the infatuated American homeowner? Well times have changed. Thanks to cheap Mexican labor, now you can have your entire yard bulldozed, hillocks piled high, massive boulders positioned, ponds excavated, ornate Mexican fountains installed all for a couple of thousand dollars and you'll never have to leave your easy chair. Better still, if your tastes change, it is cheap enough that you can do it all over again next summer!

The last time that the average American could afford to do this was 1859, in America's deep south. Now, amazingly, the average American homeowner can assume the role of an 1800's era plantation owner. Better yet, you don't even have to feed your slaves! Go down to the convenience store, get three competing crews of illegal aliens to give you a fixed price, then pick the cheapest crew to complete your personal Tara. How they can afford to eat or fend for themselves is not your problem. If they should become weak, sick or injured you can always hire a new illegal Mexican crew. In the old days, if you had slaves, your investment could be ruined if you overworked them. Just like if you ran your horse too hard. Thank goodness those backward days are behind us. The modern American Wage Slave will do whatever it takes to please you, even if it means living 6 families to a house. Plus you can sleep tight at night knowing that you gave them a chance for a better life.

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